I have spent a lifetime keeping people at a distance. Yes, I do let some in and some even become friends. Generally, though, I don’t let people to get as close as others seem to. I’m also given to tilting at windmills; often ones that I create and this has manifested itself in my being somewhat judgemental of others. That, I recognise, is not a pleasant characteristic; in fact, it says more about my own frame of mind than that of those I’ve judged. However, as I hope you will note, I write in the past tense, albeit while touching a large pile of wood in the process. So what has changed?
Well I have; along with the help from a lovely woman therapist and my family. Also from people I am involved with at the Professional Speaking Association. You see, another manifestation has been that I’m not, by nature, one of nature’s joiners. In fact, I like to do my own thing in my own way. This can mean that, not only are you reluctant to admit that you need help but that you tend not to see what is actually offered or, as I often did, think that it isn’t really relevant to you.
Well, in the past few weeks, I’ve started to see my colleagues in a different light and what is interesting is that this confirms what I believe anyway. This is that the overwhelming majority of people are decent and honest who will help if they can. So leaving the recent meeting to applause, support and smiles was quite something. I really must do more of this.
Well, present tense now, I am and have a meeting arranged next week for coffee. What a change that is.